I'm glad it's an ugly, rainy day today instead of a brilliant, shockingly beautiful Tuesday like it was six years ago. You know, I still can't believe that it happened, even though I remember things clearly, remember briskly walking through the WTC concourse, buying my metrocard at 8:44 am at the Cortlandt Street station, feeling the weird rocking sensation at 8:46 on the train that didn't leave the station or had even closed its doors.
Had I decided to stay on that train instead of stepping back onto the smoky platform I wouldn't have stepped outside, wouldn't have seen the scared woman who told me things were falling from the sky, wouldn't have seen the burned business documents floating down landing at my feet, wouldn't have seen the second plane hit the building, wouldn't have been knocked down to the ground and nearly trampled, wouldn't have met up with a bunch of guys who all had the same gut feeling to get as far away as possible from the buildings for fear that it would fall like dominoes. Between some buildings near the seaport, we looked for a fallout shelter and watched and heard the first building fall and started running again.
Had I stayed on that train until it left the station, it wouldn't have changed what happened that day, just my own experience of it.
I will never, ever forget the lives lost that day here in NY and the mark it made on my life, on this city, and on this country.